THE “IF ONLY” IS PART OF YOUR INNER CONDEMNER

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AM: My mind goes into… 

Betty: So, you go to the “what ifs.” And by now you’re learning your “what ifs” are not reliable. And the “if only” is part of your inner condemner who needs to beat you up. You don’t have to help her. A lot of this can turn to your good. And if I were in your place, I think I’d be begging the Lord, “Please don’t let me miss any of the good that you want to have come out of this, so that I can either help myself or help somebody else later on from what I’m learning.” 

AM: It is valuable. I can’t go into denial. Eventually you get faced with the truth, and then the truth really hurts. Because you made it way more painful. 

Betty: Yeah, denial does not solve things. It often makes it worse. We cannot leave until we get our job done. So, get your job done. 

AM: Yeah, I wish…

Betty: No, see, you got to stay in the present moment. Stop that. Grace is only in the present moment. It’s not in the future or the past. The “what ifs” and “if onlys” are a real temptation to you. You’ve got to stay in the present moment. For you, staying in the present moment would be a wonderful fast. Because you keep trying to escape it. Yet, healing is in the present moment. 

AM: I need to get there and learn that lesson. 

Betty: Well, keep  accepting it. Every time you come to the realization, it’s like, “Yes,  Lord. I want to develop the awareness. When it happened to me, it was a miraculous grace. And my prayer is that God will do it for you. At some moment, it’ll click.  You’ll take it into your daily life and begin living it. It’s going to be so freeing. You’ll be so grateful. So it’s like, “Lord help me to get the truth in my head and work with it as needed. “If Christ is for us, who can be against us?” When you get in the present moment, the feelings that come over from you make a decided change. You leave the place of anxiety and condemnation. Are you aware of that? Do you actually feel the difference? 

AM: Yeah. 

Betty: That’s encouraging. Because if you’re aware of it, you’re getting closer to beginning to have the strength to do it. It’s the same thing if you say, “Stay in your adult, or stay in the present moment.” Because living in the present moment is living in your adult rather than letting your child take over your life. She’s incapable of handling stuff like this. So, it’s your adult that we have hope on for your freedom. Get the freedom to make the right choices, not to go in those places where she is tortured so much by the evil one and her own self condemnation. “Lord, you are our hope. Help AM get the strength to make the right choices.  Help us to learn to make the best possible choices with what is happening in the moment. 

Put all the “what ifs” and “if onlys” aside, and choose to live in the present moment this day. That’s where God is and that’s where we will find our peace.

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